How To Set Goals and Follow Through as an ENFP
How To Stick To Something as an ENFP
If you are an ENFP who maybe sometimes has trouble setting goals and staying on track, this post is for you.
Someone asked a great question on one of my other videos about having your outcome and basically working towards it and staying focused as an ENFP.
They asked what systems or tools I have to actually stay on track and make it happen.
Initially, nothing came to mind.
And then I thought about it a bit more and I promised I’d make them a video about it.
So three strategies came to mind.
ENFP Follow-through Step #1: Clarify What You Want
The first thing is to actually clarify what it is you want and be pretty sure that is what you want.
For you that might be weighing the pros and cons.
It might be a gut feeling.
It might be thinking through. Let’s say you’re thinking about settling down in a relationship and thinking:
Is this really the guy I want?
I’ve dated those hundreds of other men and is this the one?
Actually, this is the best one. So I’ve decided I want to stick to it.
And that will be then what you want.
So you want to clarify that.
ENFP Follow-through Step #2: Share With Someone You Respect
I suggest then to write it down and have a clear outcome for yourself.
In the case of this example, it would be to be with this person and to create an awesome relationship.
Then you want to also share that with someone who you respect.
Now, we all know the difference between the two types of friends.
You have friends that when you tell them:
“I’m on a diet.” and you go out together and you eat a cheeseburger and a milkshake and they’re like: “Ah, diets, you know, we don’t follow diets.” and you pick out together.
Those friends are cool.
But we also have those friends where you’re kind of scared to tell them when you cheated on your diet because you really respect what they think about you.
And that’s someone who’s quite disciplined and follows through.
Tell that kind of friend, the friend who you want to hold you in high regard and who calls you on your shit when you lie to yourself.
ENFP Follow-through Step #3: Self-Talk
Step number three: Self-talk.
Self-talk is an awesome tool you can use to keep yourself on track.
I do this all the time, to the point where I’m actually going to film another video called: “Does this make me crazy?” and talk about self-talk and how I actually use it on a day to day basis.
But also in the long run, to stick to goals and all that kind of thing. self-talk is exactly what it sounds like – it is talking to yourself.
It’s a great tool because it can pull you out of your head.
You know, if you had the experience where you’re sort of in the moment and you’re thinking through all these thoughts, and they’re all over the map, you can only kind of talk one voice at a time.
And I find that actually speaking out loud to myself and saying:
“Hey, what was your goal? Let’s review it. This is what I want. Yes or no? Is that still true? It is true. Cool.”
So let’s ignore that little voice that popped up in my head or that emotion in the moment and let’s follow through on what I said I would do.
What did I write down?
What did I tell my friend?
Is that important to me?
Yes.
Okay, let’s follow through on that.
Now, I don’t use self-talk to re-evaluatee my decision.
Every time I have an emotional impulse, I don’t go and say:
“Okay, let’s debate through this.”
Again, I don’t reconsider the decision. This is really important.
Step one, you make your decision for what it is you want.
Step two and three are to reinforce that decision and help you come back to it.
ENFP Follow-through Bonus Step
If you want to question that decision, do so once a month at a scheduled time, not every seven minutes or every 13 seconds when your hormones kick in, and you’re emotional and you’re like:
“Oh, man, I don’t know if I should still do this. I want to change my business.”
Schedule a time once a month.
If you want to question yourself, schedule that in and say:
“Okay, Sunday the 1st I’m going to question myself and be impulsive and let my emotions run wild.”
Here’s the cool thing:
Every time you start to question your path or change directions or change your mind you can use self-talk and remind yourself:
“Nope, crazy version of myself, I’ve scheduled Sunday the 1st to question everything. Today I’m going to work, I’m going to get my stuff done like I committed to and promised myself and then on the 1st I’ll spend the whole day questioning everything and probably still end up committed to what I want to do because it’s what I really want to do.”
But I’ll give myself that date to question it.
All these other days are for doing, are for action. They are not for questioning what it is I actually want to do.
So ultimately, that is my strategy for staying on track and keeping focus on what it is you really want to do.
Give it a try and let me know in the comments how it works for you…And does this make me crazy?
I can’t be the only one who talks to myself like that, right?
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