Nov 14 Can an Idealist date a Sensor 1920

Can an Idealist (ENFP, INFP, INFJ, ENFJ) date a SENSOR?!

Accepting someone and loving them for their differences and faults is important, but before you choose to do that think through if it’s the right match.


Antonella asks an interesting dating question about being with an ESFJ. Is it possible for an Idealist (ENFP, INFP, INFJ, ENFJ) to date an S type, like an ESFJ, or is this a recipe for disaster?

The Original Question

Hi, Im an ENFP from Ecuador. I have a relationship type question. I just saw the Myers Briggs type compatibility chart and its kind of unfair that Im only compatible with half the types.

I wonder if you could help me with some advice.

I´ve heard that INTJ or INFJs are the best match for ENFPs. Sometimes another ENFP or INFP could also be a good match. However, Im actually dating an ESFJ. Ive seen why we may have our differences (I have too many deep thoughts or I connect ideas from everything I see, and he kind of enjoys life without too much thinking and our comunication requires a little bit of more effort because it has to be clear). Sometimes I feel this lack of deepness or ideas, but I try to tell me is not really important.

However, I understand that love is about loving who they are and learning to love the differences (acceptable differences). My problem is that I think too much, and Im always looking for something better (job, friends, education) and I dont want to leave people just because there might be someone better somewhere. Im happy with him, because we share the same values and see the world the same way. And to find someone who shares this, is harder than finding an INTJ.

I know ENFP – ESFJ is not the standard advice, but I know we can manage the differences. However, my “fear of failure” plays me a mind trick and sometimes I wonder if I should only search for an INTJ, ENFP or INFP.

I know Myers is trustfull and also I know that I should not take it really serious and not to overthink it but I can´t. However, I need your advice because literally Myers Compatibility chart says “Uh oh, think this one through”. I know my real problem is the fear of failure in love life, or not to be real happy in the future.

Thank you for being open to questions, I think that your job is amazing.

You are an inspiration,

Have a nice day!

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